The year that was...

2013... It was my year.

It was  the year I took control, the year I said to myself  'I will not treat you like this any more... you are worthy.'

Worthy of what exactly?

Of living.  I am worthy of living.

Of being better than I was, in all  aspects of my life, not just health wise.

War was declared and battle commenced on the 10th January 2013.

That was the day I took a frightening leap into MB's 12WBT program and haven't looked back.

I've lost heaps of weight, made many new friends from all around the country the most gorgeous one lives just a couple of hours away  and the world - some of whom I've yet to meet, and I've found my Mojo!

I've attained a fitness level that I'm not sure I've ever had before and I love it!  Now I look for ways to add movement into my day, where once I was looking for ways to move as little as possible.

Through it all Madam Lash has been right there beside me, believing in me even when I didn't believe in myself, with Minions B & T cheering me on every week giving me the incentive to keep coming back and hoping that maybe one day, I could do as well as them.

She was there when I would serve up all the excuses, when I would just go through the motions, and she was there the day it all changed, the day I woke up and suddenly found that things were somehow different.

She never once lost heart or gave up on me, and her reward was the day I walked into training and she took one look at me and said  'You've changed, what's happened?'   I said 'I don't know, something just clicked, like a switch was thrown in my head, I feel different'  

Madam Lash's Great Grandpappy

I'm sure that woman channelling her inner Redneck coz she was a'whoopin' an' a'hollerin' an' a jumpin' in the air like a new batch of 'shine was ready for bottlin'!  She was so excited! and it was more than a little bit cute...

Anyway, she's always upping the ante and I'm going from strength to strength, and while the weight loss side of things has slowed considerably, this round has seen me lose and regain the same 3kg so many times I feel like a carousel horse, up and down, around and around,  I'm improving my fitness and my shape is changing from week to week.  Best of all is that I'm still dropping dress sizes!

My head still needs constant work, Voice still tends to sneak in there when my guard is down, although now it seems to concentrate more on getting me to procrastinate rather than putting me down.  A lot of the time, I don't even realise that it's Voice that's doing the damage...

For those of you who haven't been with me from the beginning of this blog, Voice is the name I gave to the inner dialogue that is constantly streaming in my head.  Voice has done a lot of damage over the years, and it's a daily - sometimes hourly - battle to keep it quiet.  Voice, I've recently learned, is depression.  Does everyone with depression have a 'Voice'?  I don't know.  But I do know that my Dad does, and I know that I do.  I wrote about it once, you can find it here.

I tend to go off the track, fall off the wagon, lose the plot a lot, but I tend to find the track, climb back on to the wagon, and find the plot just as many times.  I do get disappointed in myself, but I never give up.

Why don't I give up?

Because there's too much at stake.

Because I can't afford to give up.  Because I want to see my children get married.  Because I want to be there when they give me Grandchildren to spoil.  Because I'm always going to be fighting this battle until the day I die, old and wrinkly, and healthy except for the whole being dead thing  and not fat, in my bed.

In 2013 I did things that I had never done before, like entering Fun Runs, and in 2014 I will participate in even more of them than I did last year.

NB:  remember to insert the words 'Amusing Walk' in place of the words 'Fun Run' wherever they appear.

I've been through the Australian Running Calendar and have picked out the ones I'd like to do.  I'm aiming for one a month beginning in February with a Park Run and ending in December with the Variety Santa Fun Run.  Of course the most meaningful one will be the Hunter Valley Marathon held at Hunter Valley Gardens in July, as it was the very first ever Fun Run that I did, so it's a bit special to me.

There will also be mountains to climb.  Not, however, the figurative variety, but real actual Mountains with a capital 'M'.  Well, one Mountain.  But one is more than none...

Burning Mountain NSW

Burning Mountain is the one I have my sight set on.  It's in the Upper Hunter near a place called Wingen, which apparently has a marvelous pub, and it's actually on fire - the Mountain not the pub!  There's an underground coal seam that has been burning for something like 5,500 years and the area gets quite warm, so I think winter may be the time to do it.

I've also discovered I have a love of running shoes and workout gear, which still amuses me... but it will never, can  never replace my love of handbags and doona covers.

So what does 2014 hold for me?

Fun Runs to do - heaps of...

Voices to silence - just the one...

Friday Fist Pumps to have - 52...

Weight to lose - many many kilos...

New friends to meet - sky is the limit...

12WBT rounds to join - another four...

Mountains to climb - we'll start with one...

Old friends to catch up with - a special few...

Mini milestones to achieve - as many as I can...

Wedding Anniversary to celebrate - first of many...

Running shoes, handbags & doona covers - as many as is humanly possible without being divorced...

Gratuitous shot of my latest acquisition.